5 Years with Type One Diabetes
The last five years of my life with type one diabetes have felt like one major juxtaposition. I have felt both invisible and like the center of attention; I have felt like I am both on top of the world and carrying its weight on my shoulders; I have felt both alone and like I am part of something bigger than myself; I have felt both hopeless and hopeful; I have felt both helpless and like I am a human wrecking ball; I have felt both like a blazing fire that is getting brighter, and like one that is burning out. I look back to the person I was before my diagnosis, and I do not recognize her. I have said many times that diabetes does not define me, but it really does. It dictates everything I can do, how far I can go, and how I can get there. Multiple diagnoses I have received in the last five years have put me through so many metamorphoses and forced me to shed so many layers of skin I thought I would be able to wear forever, and each rebirth has put me through pressure and self-doubt